"I Want My 'PHT" (Talk about Nothing...)

(Sung to the tune of "Money for Nothing" by Dire Straights)
Parody Lyrics by Gary

<BGSOUND src="../audio/midi/phtparody.mid">
 

 

Fade in ...
I want my, I want my PHT, 
I want my, I want my PHT,
I want my, I want my PHT,
I want my, I want my PHT,  .. .

 

 

Written during a time of turmoil and at a low point in the ratings for WPHT
Smerconish returns to the station on May 13th.  The idea for this parody came before then as people were mad at the station for fooling with the lineup.  At the time of his return the station is running a laptop contest.

Warning this is a JOKE, a lame attempt at humor.  If you're offended then that's just too damn bad.
 

Now look at them yo-yo's that's the way you do it
You play a talk host on my 'PHT.
It ain't workin' and the ratings sure do show it
Talk about nothin' and the laptops are free
Now that ain't workin' love the way they spin it
Lemme tell ya them guys ain't dumb
Cut off some callers with your little finger
Maybe get a blister on your tongue

We gotta meet with the advertisers
Custom 18 Karat JeWelrreeeeeeeeee
We gotta move these BMWs
We gotta hawk these Direct TV's

See the right wing talker with the law degree from U Penn
Yeah buddy he's shaved his head
That talker got his own newspaper column
That bald headed talker is a millionaire

We gotta meet with the advertisers
Custom 18 Karat JeWelrreeeeeeeeee
We gotta move these BMWs
We gotta hawk these Direct TV's

I shoulda learned to shout and scream
I shoulda learned to piss people off
Look at that teacher, he's frothing at the mouth
Man he sure is having fun
Hey Dom's on now, what's that ? Italian noises ?
Spittin' in the mic, mad as he can be
That ain't workin' that's the way you do it
Talk about nothin' and the laptops are free

We gotta meet with the advertisers
Custom 18 Karat JeWelrreeeeeeeeee
We gotta move these BMWs
We gotta hawk these Direct TV's, Lord

Now if it ain't workin' here's the way you spin it
You change the lineup on my "PHT
If it ain't workin' then just go and change it
Talk about nothin' and the laptops are free
Talk about nothin' and the laptops are free

 

 

Original Lyrics
Money For Nothing (Mark Knopfler / Sting)

Now look at them yo-yo's that's the way you do it
You play the guitar on the MTV
That ain't workin' that's the way you do it
Money for nothin' and chicks for free
Now that ain't workin' that's the way you do it
Lemme tell ya them guys ain't dumb
Maybe get a blister on your little finger
Maybe get a blister on your thumb

We gotta install microwave ovens
Custom kitchen deliveries
We gotta move these refrigerators
We gotta move these color TV's

See the little faggot with the earring and the make-up
Yeah buddy that's his own hair
That little faggot got his own jet airplane
That little faggot he's millionaire

We gotta install microwawve ovens
Custom kitchen deliveries
We gotta move these refrigerators
We gotta move these color TV's

I shoulda learned to play the guitar
I shoulda learned to play them drums
Look at that mama, she got it stickin' in the camera
Man we could have some fun
And he's up there, what's that ? Hawaiian noises ?
Bangin' on the bongoes like a chimpanzee
That ain't workin' that's the way you do it
Get your money for nothin' get your chicks for free

We gotta install ovens
Custom kitchen deliveries
We gotta move these refrigerators
We gotta move these color TV's, Lord

Now that ain't workin' that's the way you do it
You play the guitar on the MTV
That ain't workin' that's the way you do it
Money for nothin' get your chicks for free
Money for nothin' get chicks for free

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