This week I realized my "Life Dream # 457" by actually getting the chance to go one on one with the famous "Cornpone Caller" on the Dom Giordano show. For those that don't know who he is, Cornpone is probably the biggest idiot ever to call any talk station, besides me. Always sounding very drunk he pesters the producers up to a dozen times a show and leaves multiple voice messages.
Originally he targeted his nonsense on Phil Valentine, he tried to tag Phil with the nickname "Cornpone" but Phil turned the tables on him by nicknaming him the "Cornpone Caller." He then turned his attention to Dom Giordano who renamed him "The artist originally known as the Cornpone Caller now known as the Cornpone Caller again."
Regular listeners relish his calls, it's comforting to know that no matter what goes wrong in life there is always somebody out there that is a bigger idiot than the rest of us. I received several emails asking to post the challenge I presented to him. Cornpone claimed to earn $75K per year in a recent exchange with Dom. I called Dom to offer an additional $75K IF he can do the following,
Present a W-2 proving he actually earned $75K
Accurately spell "Cornpone"
Count to 12 without taking off his shoes.
Cornpone will take Dom and me out to a 4 star eatery to consummate the deal.
It wasn't long before Cornpone called in to take me to task but deftly sidestepped my offer. He countered with a brilliant diversion, he called me a fag. oooohhhhhhh... I'm soooo scared.
As a tribute to the Cornpone we present the "Dom, Dom the Demagogue" Rap Lyrics anonymously faxed in to DB, sung by producer John Stolnis with backup vocals by none other than The Cornpone Caller. Produced at WWDB. All rights reserved - WWDB.
Update - The gentleman who came up with the idea of creating a cornpone caller email account has generously offered to pass along that account with it's password to the Cornpone Caller if he can figure out how to use a PC. Let's all hold our breath shall we?